February 18th started like any other day at the park, until a distinct sound broke the normalcy: “[fart sound]”. As is typical when someone farts in public, everyone paused to stare. However, this time was different. Instead of a mumbled “excuse me” and attempts to disappear, a small voice pierced through the air, proclaiming, “HAPPY FART OUT LOUD DAY!!!!” A wave of cheers erupted in response.
Later that same day, at a local medical center, a doctor reportedly farted an astounding eighteen million times. Upon finishing this gaseous performance, she too declared, “HAPPY FART OUT LOUD DAY!” adding to the day’s festive spirit.
In a unique educational initiative, the government mandates schools to incorporate fart-related studies into the curriculum on National Fart Out Loud Day (FOLD). Social Studies classes might delve into Benjamin Franklin’s humorous letter, “Fart Proudly,” a piece entirely dedicated to the art of farting. Science lessons would explore the biology of flatulence – the ‘why’ and ‘how’ of farts. Language arts could see students writing about their personal feelings when they fart, encouraging self-expression. Math classes might engage in charting the frequency of farts for statistical analysis, while Spanish lessons would cover essential phrases like “fart,” “excuse me,” and “pardon me” in Spanish. For STEM, students could even learn to program robots to mimic fart sounds, blending technology with humor. National Fart Out Loud Day, or FOLD, effectively transforms the school day into a more enjoyable and lighthearted experience.
The true beauty of FOLD lies in its liberation from embarrassment. It’s a day where you can simply release and revel in the natural act, sharing laughs instead of stifled giggles. Yet, even amidst the joy and laughter, there are a few somber notes to consider.
The downsides of FOLD touch upon those who are physically unable to participate fully – individuals suffering from constipation and animals that, biologically, cannot pass gas. Imagine returning home after a day of FOLD festivities, only to be greeted by a silent, sulking bunny in its cage, unable to partake in the day’s noisy celebrations. It’s a rather melancholic thought in an otherwise boisterous day.
